Omoya Yinka Simult

Voila! You are permitted to have a peep into my thinking room for free here. No charges. I'm that much generous.


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I AIN’T NOBODY’S BITCH

Em, my intention was to sleep early last night cos I wanted to wake up in time to jog this morning, so I went to bed around 12 midnight.

Just as I put the pillow aside to catch some z’s (as I never sleep using a pillow, which means I’m pretending if you catch me asleep with a pillow, and that’s a cue that I probably do not like your face or the trouble that comes with it😛), the idea for the flash story you’ll find below hit me. It’s titled “I Ain’t Nobody’s Bitch”.

If you’re a writer, you’d know it’s a curse, cos a story can’t wait. It possesses you like a demon, and you’re not relieved until exorcised. And that’s exactly what happened. Yup, you guessed right: jogging got rescheduled. Blah, blah, blah… Nothing I could do about that🤷‍♂

***+++***

 

I AIN’T NOBODY’S BITCH

I walk into the conference room and see a five-man panel ready to interview me. I smile and tell myself this kind of fun is long overdue. Before I begin to make myself super comfortable in my seat, their boss who is in a bow tie fires at me: “Young lady, we don’t have much time. Why should we hire you?”

Hahahah, I laugh within. These people don’t know every day of my life has been designed to get me ready for this and what is to come. I clear my throat and indulge them, giving them a peep into myself.

First, they are interested, and soon they are enchanted. Presently, they want to discuss remunerations and allowances. This one is talking about pecks and incentives, and that one is talking about bonuses and whatnots.

Hahahah, I laugh again, this time loud and clear. The conference room goes quiet. I look at their boss who is in a bow tie and fire back at him: “Young man, I don’t have much time. Why should I work for you?”

Everyone is at a loss for words. Silence persists. I stand up and pick my things to leave, although their eyes wish to hold me down.

~~~Omoya

Get a copy of my e-book, Naija Campus Tales. It is an interesting collection of stories on campus life as narrated by a Nigerian medical student.

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Comments

  1. Olaoluwa Olanrewaju says

    November 21, 2018 at 4:23 pm

    Human nature, as it seems, does not follow that like-manner. Almost all the time, we derail ourselves of such things that can uplift us to some certain levels above the world. We prefer to curl our hands around our knees waiting for a change somewhere to happen while we lose all time in the world, doing anything but nothing about our problems.

    Should I say it is because of lack of self-esteem or confidence or rather the art of public-speaking is yet to evolve in itself or in us?

    Trust me, asking ourselves all these will only add, not trying to objurgate the problems. Nonetheless, we should remember that we can not give what we do not possess and by trying to give, one must have achieved some certain protocols – confidence, ego, esteem and the belief in oneself- for he who believes, prospers.

    That, will not only save us from our lazy selves but will get us unridiculed and dampened for whatever lies in store for us in this formidable life.

    I had wanted to turn this to a joke; but ew for me, it didn’t come right, not as I had expected.

    Love your write-ups. Keep it up, older brother. I envy you.

    Reply
    • Omoya says

      November 25, 2018 at 10:24 am

      That’s an engaging one, Olaoluwa. I’m glad you were able to draw your own meanings from the piece. Thanks for stopping by.

      Reply

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(c) 2017 Omoya Simult